Wednesday, November 15, 2006

I'm getting a complex!

Ok, I'm getting really creeped out by these damn ads... How on earth did they know I woke up with an intense desire to become an ambassador for promoting enlightenment through see-through food wrap?

Get out of my head!!!

I'm all about change!

Hey there! You'll notice that the blog has a new look - I found that the old layout was a little hard to read and perhaps a little too colourful... I don't want a lawsuit resulting from someone having a seizure; that would be bad karma indeed.

I've also created a flickr account, so I can start posting some of my very amateur photography for the world to see. Expect some pics to be posted by the weekend!

That's it for me - what have YOU changed today?

Tuesday, November 14, 2006

How did they KNOW??

So, I'm just reading one of my various online comic strips today, when my eye happened to catch the following advertisements at the bottom of the page:

Now, from what (admittedly) little I understand, I thought these ads were dynamic and were generated by the content of the page you're viewing. So if you were on a message board about video games, for example, you'd see ads for gaming magazines and super-caffeinated beverages. And probably porn. Then again, they advertise porn on pretty much every webpage - it's universal!

These ads, I am proud to say, were most definitely NOT generated by the page I was viewing. I don't read any comics about offing East Coasters, nor anthropomorphic animal interactions. As far as targeted marketing goes, this one was a dud. Perhaps they need to hire someone from the French Ministry of Defense? (If this reference is lost on you, then I think you need to pay more attention to my previous entries, especially since there's only 3. Or buy some Ritalin, ADD-boy/girl.)

Or perhaps I'm severely mistaken, and dynamic web marketing has progressed light years in sophistication... After all, I just so happen to be a maritimer! In truth, I am from that remarkably trapezoidal-shaped province that boasts both the world's largest lobster statue and the world's longest covered bridge! Has the entity known only as "Ads by Google" perfected some sort of technology, nay - sorcery, that can cross the vast virtual span of the interweb and peer directly into my mind, and see that I grew up not 15 minutes away from Magnetic Hill?

If so, then this could have dire implications for me - maybe I should be looking up childhood friends to see if any have eaten fatally poisonous fiddleheads lately? Or maybe I have a subconscious yearning to dress up as a squirrel and nibble on nuts?

Monday, November 13, 2006

Musing of the day

Ever walk into a public washroom that smelled so incomprehensibly vile, that you were ready to walk out and risk soiling yourself later, rather than risk having even a hint of that stench insinuate itself into your clothing and hang about you like a cloud of doom? Um, yah... Me neither. Certainly not today, I assure you. And the fact that I'm wearing one of my nicer dress shirts (which I would really hate to have to burn) has nothing to do with it either.

I know I promised this post would be about kittens. But Santa promised me an Optimus Prime for Christmas when I was 10; if that fat bastard can renege, so can I.

Thursday, November 09, 2006

Let's start off with a bang!


French Missile Test

Now, as a matter of principle, I don't comment on world affairs, but this article was begging for it. A few excerpts that I'd like to draw to your attention:

"...the first experimental flight of the M51 strategic missile carried out, as always, without a warhead..."

Does this even bear mentioning? Are people really worried that they were testing a missile that could quite possibly explode on the launch pad with a nuclear warhead? I mean, the launch pad is near Bordeaux! Can you imagine what that would do to the wine industry? "Oh, 2006 was a terrible year for Chateaux Poutine... It might be okay if you age it though... How long, you ask? Hmm, what's the half-life of weapons-grade plutonium, again?" And even if it did lift off with a nuclear warhead, isn't less of an experiment and more, I dunno, an act of war?

"A heavy police presence was in place around the missile testing center to prevent disruption of the launch by environmentalist groups."

Umm... I thought these things were usually disrupted by peace activists, not environmentalists. Did the environmentalist movement change vision statements lately? If so, then sorry for my ignorance.

"Its enhanced accuracy is designed to reduce "collateral damage," according to the defense ministry."

Well, that's certainly good news. It would certainly be embarrassing if they fired at the US (come on, you know they WANT to!) and hit Belgium instead. Though I'm not sure that reducing "collateral damage" is a top priority when using nuclear weapons.

Ok, that's it for this post. I will make the next one a lot more frivolous, I promise. Kittens! I'll write about cute fluffy kittens!

The start of an era...

...of disjointed ramblings. Seriously. Nothing you read here will change your life. Feel free to close this window and go back to surfing for stock quotes or french toast recipes.

Still here?

Damn. Guess I'll need to post something for you to read then, or the guilt will simply be unbearable.